sooo, we finally met up with each other yesterday, first impression, ok, physically, not quite what I expected, he is pretty dark-skinned, and short, like similar height with me... so we met up at hornsby westfield, then he drove hyungie to top ryde, where we had schnitz for lunch, and we talked some more, it was pretty awkward actually, cos I saw him from afar first, and I just gave him a quick small hug, and there were a few times during our little date that I know he was trying to hold my hand, but it was pretty awkward, and he kept rubbing my finger, so I kind of subtly pulled away, and he kissed me on the cheek twice... after lunch, we decided to drive to eastwood and we had oliver brown's waffles for dessert... he was really nice, but I could tell he was nervous as well... cos he sounded way more confident over the phone...
the problem is I know I have feelings for him, but I dunno whether these feelings mean I truly like him or whether I just feel comfortable talking to him as a friend... and he already told me more than once he is starting to fall in love with me... and everyone around me who knows, kept telling me to slow down, and to make sure of his intentions and his future plans are first... but sometimes, I also feel like we do know each other quite well, and I do trust him at this stage... I can't predict what's going to happen in future, but at this stage, I think I am going to go with my gut instincts and feelings and see where this leads us to...
and on the other hand, pongie was again upset with me yesterday and we had another blowup, in addition to the one on saturday, when papa was apparently upset with both of us for different reasons, hence my initial plan of telling them was postponed... and yesterday it got to the point that I felt so bad towards him that I told him it's not too late to give us up, cos really, I have too much drama in my life right now... since this whole thing started... it's pretty much one drama after another every week... and one of the things which really made me feel like he really likes me and is serious about us is the way he handled the whole situation and is willing to compromise and wait for me... I was pretty shocked when he told me that he was really upset and he had tears in his eyes when he read my message asking him to walk away from this yesterday... hence why, I am trusting these feelings and my gut instinct telling me that he is a trustworthy person and that he genuinely cares for me... despite what other people are telling me... anyway, we decided that 27 April is the day we officially "talked" and knew of one another, so this friday 27 May will be our 1 month anniversary, and we are planning to go have dinner after work... anyway, watch this space...
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