4 mOrE DAys...

sat down with Laura pscyh yesterday, and of course, talked about the events last week again, and seriously, I don't know what upsets me about that particular patient and situation... or maybe it's just the accumulation of having to work and tolerate her these past months... was feeling hurt that I was not invited to Kara's wedding actually, and it sounded like she invited kate and her of all people...obviously we are not as close as I thought we were... took another 'sickie' today, things are getting alittle too much at work actually, and I am now overdue for some time away... sooo looking forward to our trip, this is one of the rare times when I wish the weekend would go quickly... on the job seeking front, pretty bad, not many jobs out atm, which means I am probably going to be stuck for longer at Nepean... ohh... time to order new uniforms, and this time, it's all self measure, and ordering online, good and bad I guess, the colour is not the best, it's like the crescent skirt colour, but we get to wear scrubs which looked pretty comfortable... stay tuned...

started re-reading my in death series for maybe the millionth time, finished watching School 2013, it was actually pretty good, sad at times, but also with some funny scenes in between...pretty much finished packing for the trip, and realised that on the trip there, we cannot carry shampoo and stuff cos we only have carryon luggage, but we only realised that after we bought all the stuff... hey but at least it was better late than never...and get all the stuff confiscated at the airport... 

4 more days left...

I NEed to GEt OUt...

this week has been shitty, especially since wednesday...

wednesday morning, I attended the pall care CC instead of Dawn, and becos it went for 1.5hours, she was like what took you so long?? you should have left etc etc... and then started talking about one of the new referrals, and her not knowing the pt and the full story, said I want you to do a formal cognitive Ax, even though I said I did not think it was necessary... but she insisted that I do one regardless... initially I wanted to ignore her and do what I thought was appropriate, but it just so happened that something else came up and I thought maybe I should do a formal cognitive Ax as well, not becos she TOLD me to do it, but becos an issue regarding the pt's capacity to make decisions came up... 

and then on thurs, another dreaded lymph clinic day, but becos it was Kate, not as stressful, but in the pm, when I was doing MRT, the student and I spent quite alot of time with one of the patients and I think the both of us were becoming frustrated with the documentation of the session by the end of the day... 

then today, Dawn was like how many active pts do you have on your list? and I said 2-3, and she was like, you are not managing with your current caseload, and 2-3 pts are not alot, a normal caseload should be 10-11, you need to be prioritising your pts blah blah blah... anyway, spent quite a long time sorting out the d/c of the above pt today, and then seeing 2 other pts who also took quite awhile, and in the end, did not even have time for morning tea or lunch... and just before going home, she was like, was I ok?? what happened with the pt earlier, and why it took so long etc etc... and I pretty much told her that I did not appreciate her making me feel like I am not doing any work, becos I felt like I helped someone today, even though the outcome was not ideal and even though it took such a long time... and that I simply cannot understand her reasoning behind asking me to do the cognitive assessment which I did not think was necessary... I could have gone further, and said what I really want to say since I started in cancercare... which is... 

you are a person who says one thing and does the other, who refuses to work with someone becos you are not able to get along with them, and expects people around to also not work with them, someone whom I lost all respect for since the day you threw a tantrum and stomped out of a meeting becos nobody read the document that you circulated, and the day when you actually had to take "stress leave" becos you had a disagreement with another staff member... you make it really difficult to work with you, becos I feel like I have to watch everything I say and do... and to work with the other staff members, when they are one of the essential members of the team... and you disliked it everytime you found out that I spoke to the staff member about pts... even though you would be ok and even encouraged me to speak to the other care coordinators about pts... you always said I need to work on my verbal communication, and I need to tell you everything, but you are the one who asked me to see the pts on the ward becos you are busy with other stuff, and I did and then you decide that you have some time, and so you go see the pts without telling me...

dunno how long more I can tolerate this situation... I NEED TO GET OUT! kate is more than welcome to have my position anytime!

倒数两个星期。。。

damn, coming onto 3 weeks now, and not a single word from my job application... pretty much gave up on the job already, wish they would actually at least send out an email informing people that they did not get the position, rather than leave people like me hanging...

easter long weekend... started off on friday am with a nightmare... multiple long trails of ants in the kitchen, all the way up to the ceiling, and in the bathroom and room... it was disgusting... spent the whole morning cleaning, and spraying, and drenched the whole kitchen in vinegar... so far, the ants are staying away, bought 'extra' protection when we go away in 2 weeks' time... 

after the whole morning spent cleaning, went to auntie's place, and hung out with prisy... watched running man, played this new monopoly card game with xtine and marga... it was actually quite fun, required thinking, strategy... 

sat... went for a walk, and found a nice park close by, which I was very excited about, not warming up before climbing the stairs was a mistake, as our legs were killing us especially going down steps... went to watch Oz the movie, it was ok, the graphics were good, other than that, storyline not as good as wicked the musical we went to... went out into the city, the usual, but it was actually quite crowded... ate lindt, korean food, not sure why, but they no longer sell the spicy chicken on a hotplate I ordered the last time... and the dishes no longed come with rice, unless it specifically says with rice... karaoke, and we had to pay $15 each cos it was a public holiday... 

sun... working during the day, kept telling myself to think abt the money, but it was actually not too bad that day... went for dinner at eastwood korean place with xtine and marga... marga recommended jonga jip, it was packed at the store, and we were then told to go to the other branch nearby, walked in and it was sooo smokey... the vents were obviously not working at all, luckily, we got to sit upstairs... anyway, the food was still not as good as the usual korean hotpot place we go to...

monday... got up early, excited that this was our first easter egg hunt in 2 years, even got to the shops really early, and ended up with only a handful of eggs... so disappointing! strategy next year would be to start our hunt even earlier! did our grocery shop, cleaning for the week, washing for the week, cooked both meals, pongie decided to try grilling some chicken wings, I think I may have took the chicken out a little too early, cos it was still a little bloody inside... :( 

and it's back to work today... nothing very exciting... counting down to the nz trip!